What Truly Sets the Best Apart

Confidence and arrogance often get mistaken for each other. From the outside, they can look remarkably similar—strong-willed, unwavering, even bold. But spend enough time around high performers, and the distinction becomes glaringly obvious. One fuels growth and elite performance; the other stifles it.

Confidence is Earned, Arrogance is Assumed

When Virat Kohli walks onto the field, he believes he is the best. Not because he says it, not because he wants to project dominance, but because he has trained, prepared, and put in the work to support that belief. His confidence isn’t manufactured—it’s built on evidence. He doesn’t just tell himself he’s the best; he steps onto the pitch knowing he’s done everything in his power to be the best. He knows that this does not guarantee success, but it does give him the best possible chance.

On the flip side, arrogance is the illusion of certainty without the substance to back it up. It’s the player who talks a big game but hasn’t put in the work. It’s the athlete who refuses feedback because they “already know.” While confidence opens doors to improvement and performance under pressure, arrogance shuts them, leaving the individual resistant to change and growth.

The Uncoachable Player: Where Arrogance Blocks Learning

Some players are extremely coachable—they seek knowledge, absorb feedback, and discern what’s relevant for them. They trust their instincts but remain open to new ways of thinking. Then, there are those who “already know.” These players often struggle to improve because their arrogance prevents them from being truly reflective.

The irony? The best performers are often the most coachable. They don’t see learning as a threat; they see it as an edge. The moment you stop learning, you stop growing—and in elite sport, stagnation equals decline.

Balancing Confidence and Openness to Learning

Like everyone else, the best also experience underlying self-doubt, but don’t allow it to control them. They also don’t allow overconfidence to blind them. They understand that growth isn’t about blindly taking on every piece of advice, but about filtering what’s relevant while maintaining belief in their own game.

To be truly great:

• Prepare Relentlessly – Confidence comes from ‘studying the whole book for the exam’ – from knowing you’ve done the work.
• Stay Open to Learning – The best keep their learning curve steeper than the rest.
• Build self-worth separate from results – While the world may judge you by your results, do not do this to yourself. Take confidence from your preparation, focus on your performance, and leave the result to look after itself.

For Coaches and Leaders: Shaping Confidence Without Enabling Arrogance

If you’re leading a team—whether in sport or business—you’ll encounter both confident learners and arrogant know-it-alls. The key is to create an environment where confidence is nurtured but arrogance is exposed for what it is: a roadblock to progress.

A few ways to foster confidence while keeping arrogance in check:

• Learning above winning. Win or lose, ask the same question, “What did you learn today?”
• Reinforce preparation over bravado. The best aren’t just mentally strong; they’re physically and technically prepared.
• Focus on behaviour not the person. Provide feedback without coddling. Challenge individuals to own their growth rather than relying on external validation.

Final Thought

Confidence is the engine of high performance, but it has to be earned. Arrogance, on the other hand, is a poor imitation—one that ultimately exposes itself when pressure rises. The best athletes, teams, and leaders don’t just talk about being great; they do the work, stay open to learning, and let their performances speak for themselves.